Thursday, April 11, 2013

I’m a Bad, Bad Blogger

Back when I started this blog I had grand ambitions of it being a place where I could foster my creativity and grow my writing skills.  I swore I would write insightful, funny posts and do my very best to be a devoted and authentic blogger.  I didn’t do too bad the first month or so.  I wasn’t blogging as much as I wanted to, but I was at least getting some stuff out there.  Then, life happened.
The month of January was an incredibly stressful time.  Some of it good, some of it bad, but all of it very intense and anxiety provoking.  I’ve already written about losing my sweet puppy dog.  I thought I was prepared for it, but it was much harder than I anticipated.  Then, I came down with the flu. Also during that month I found out that I was being moved to a new team at work and I had to move to a new office space twice within three weeks.  Hubby accepted a new position that would entail him being out of town for a solid month.  Oh, and we also had to have our roof replaced.
By the time hubby left for his month long business trip I was feeling completely frazzled.  I really planned on using my time alone to get the chaos under control.  I had a plan and it seemed fool-proof.  Unfortunately, by that time I had nothing left.  No gas in my tank. I was physically and mentally exhausted.  So, I gave myself a break.  Oh, I still went to work and kept the house livable.  But I watched a lot of television and ate a lot of fast food.  I kept thinking that I should blog, but I just didn’t have the gumption to do it.
When hubby finally got back we took a vacation to Florida.  It was great spending some time away and great having him home.  I kept thinking life would calm down, but it just kept getting more and more hectic.  Between his crazy schedule and my job it seemed like every week was just a race to survive until the weekend.  I kept thinking that I should blog, but who could find the time?
I finally started thinking that maybe I should just stop even trying to blog.  I should just take down the few posts I had written and call this a failed experiment.  After all, my life is totally chaotic and out of control right now.  Could I really justify taking time to just sit at my computer and write?  Just when I was about to kill the blog, I got to thinking that maybe this would actually be the best time to write.  I wanted a creative outlet, maybe giving myself one would allow me to start taking back control of my life. Maybe enforcing some disciple around my postings would help me to start taming the chaos. 
So, I am back.  I’m glad that I never really decided on a theme or a direction for this blog.  Because it looks like for now it is going to be about bringing you along on the journey as I try to get to get my house and my life organized again.  Wish me luck!

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